You need emotional intelligence. In traffic discussions, at work meetings, in disagreements with friends and family. Knowing how to recognize emotions and what to do with them is an essential skill.
There have never been so many anxious people in Brazil and the world. If our country was already leader in this ranking across the planet, according to the WHO, the global prevalence of depression and anxiety grew 25% with the pandemic.
There are reasons why people feel out of place, it's undeniable. But that doesn't mean throwing everything away. Therefore, it is about the ability to manage feelings in the midst of everything we experience that emotional intelligence arises.
Find out more about the term, its main theory and its importance below.
What is emotional intelligence?
Firstly, emotional intelligence is an area of study within psychology that examines the human ability to deal with one's emotions. Thus, they guide the decisions we make and the way we face daily challenges.
The book Emotional Intelligence, by the writer, psychologist and journalist Daniel Goleman, is the main reference on the subject. With publication in 1995, the author mentions the existence of two minds – rational and emotional.
Goleman believes that Emotional Quotient (EQ) is more important than IQ for a person to be successful.
Therefore, while IQ constantly develops with access to information, EQ needs different stimuli.
Although some researchers suggest that Emotional Intelligence is an innate ability, Goleman and those who follow his line believe the opposite.
It would therefore be a characteristic to be learned and strengthened on a daily basis.
Example of emotional intelligence
We can't turn our emotions on and off. Thus, emotional intelligence can be important in as many examples as there are possible experiences in our lives.
However, let's imagine a scenario from the point of view of the reader of this text.
You are here on our blog, reading a little about this subject, but you have a lot of things to do. Soon, a feeling of guilt may arise, perhaps a voice saying “close that tab and do your thing”.
This is the moment when emotions appear. Would these 10 or 15 minutes of reading be procrastination? Isn't it important knowledge and a healthy break from your routine? Would you solve all your tasks in a short time?
Recognizing emotions while performing a task is just one part of emotional intelligence.
An example of reading this text is soft, but during the professional journey, social relationships and ethical dilemmas, the steps are much more difficult.
Emotional intelligence phrases
Therefore, using Daniel Goleman's work as a reference, we will quote five emotional intelligence phrases below:
- When I say controlling emotions, I mean truly stressful and disabling emotions. Feeling emotions is what makes our lives rich.
- Emotions are contagious. We all know this from experience. After a good coffee with a friend, you feel good. When you encounter a rude clerk in a store, you feel bad.
- The fundamental task of leaders is to install good feelings in those they lead.
- For better or worse, when emotions dominate, the intellect cannot lead us anywhere.
- Controlling impulses or dealing with hurt is as important for preventing violence as it is for controlling anger.
The 5 pillars of emotional intelligence
In the book Emotional Intelligence, the author cites 5 fundamental pillars of skill that can be developed.
So, these would be the first steps to start practicing it. The pillars are:
Self-awareness
The first step is to know yourself. Do you often think about your reactions to everyday events?
It's worth allowing yourself to reflect on your own emotions little by little. Realize, in stressful situations, what sensations are caused and how your mind and body react to them.
Control of emotions
Once you recognize your emotions, you will have greater ability to, when possible and willing, control them.
Of course, this is not an easy task and, repeating the metaphor, we do not have an on or off button for emotions. But there are moments in life when we need to stop impulses and have clarity in our thoughts.
Self motivation
It's an internal process. It is the search for alignment of feelings with your personal goals. Viewing setbacks positively, as something to learn from, is a characteristic of motivated people.
Empathy: recognizing the other’s emotion
It's not always possible to embrace the world and put yourself in everyone else's shoes. But it is possible to recognize the emotions of others and seek to understand the reason for their behavior.
When we practice empathy, we become more understanding and sensitive and our emotions and impulses take a backseat.
Interpersonal relationships
The world is made of people. 7 billion people. And interacting in social environments, even though nowadays it is only possible through screens, is very important.
In the professional journey, improving interpersonal relationships is a soft skills that can make all the difference.
How important is emotional intelligence?
The importance of developing emotional intelligence is to improve interpersonal relationships and boost professional success. People who can be more aware of their emotions have more control over their lives.
Emotional intelligence will ensure that established goals are achieved more consistently. Knowing how to deal with emotions is something that affects all areas of our lives.
Self-confidence and self-esteem. Two important characteristics for most people and which are entirely linked, as mentioned in the 5 pillars, to emotional intelligence.
They improve communication and performance, which results in a more qualified professional.
Emotional intelligence at work
It is the technical profile that gets people hired, but it is the behavior that keeps them employed. This is what a Page Personnel survey showed.
The global recruitment consultancy took into account the response of 1,400 human resources executives. In the survey, 9 out of 10 people are terminated due to behavioral problems.
Knowing how to manage emotions can guarantee a more successful and long-lasting career.
You may have an out-of-control episode at home, or with a friend, but what about your employer, would this be acceptable?
Balanced employees tend to make better decisions even in troubled environments. Consequently, they are the ones who can change the atmosphere and make the place more pleasant.
Emotional intelligence is among the soft skills most valued by great leaders in Latin America, according to research Skills 360. The PageGroup study shows that 33.8% of the responses cited the term.
What are the benefits of emotional intelligence?
In the midst of a routine full of demands, commitments and hints of stress, it is necessary to find a balance.
If you still have doubts about whether it is worth considering developing this skill, we will list below a list of the benefits of emotional intelligence.
- reduction of anxiety;
- healthier relationships;
- more empathy;
- better decision making;
- greater sense of commitment and responsibility;
- focus on solutions;
- ability to listen to criticism;
- know how to deal with crises;
- increased productivity;
- better time management.
Self-knowledge and emotional intelligence: understand the relationship
Know what we are feeling. Because we are feeling it. Which is the basis of good intuition and good decision making.
Trying to improve your emotional intelligence skills without self-knowledge is like trying to put together a puzzle without knowing the whereabouts of the pieces.
How could we manage emotions if we don't know how to recognize them in ourselves? Pointing at someone else is usually easier.
You need to create a process of self-reflection to discover what needs to change in yourself.
More than anything, like all types of knowledge and intelligence, the path is continuous. Not even the wisest expert on a subject knows everything about it, and when it comes to your own emotions, you will never achieve 100% of them.
How to develop emotional intelligence?
As a skill that can be developed, there are a range of books and multimedia content on emotional intelligence.
In Brazil, the focus on the subject is such that there is an agency dedicated to this: the SBIE (Brazilian Society of Emotional Intelligence).
In addition to being a moral regulator for this soft skills, the entity also offers several tips for developing this skill. A visit to the Society's website is recommended.
In addition, you can also watch lectures and consult free materials on Google on Youtube.
On the video platform, we found numerous speeches by the author of the book Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman.
On LinkedIn Learning, for example, there is a course available on how to develop your emotional intelligence. Classes are divided into 5 modules with short videos guided by psychologist Gemma Leigh Roberts.
How to develop emotional intelligence in the workplace?
Once you develop emotional intelligence, you will see how it affects the work environment. You can avoid major stress that hinders your and your team's productivity.
Therefore, learning to control emotions and impulses before making decisions or talking about the company's core is a way of improving skills.
As previously stated, this “talent” has become as admired in professionals as technical capabilities.
To focus on emotional intelligence at work, you can: analyze your own behaviors during work, test yourself in moments of pressure, try to express yourself more (at the right moments) and develop empathy.
How to stimulate emotional intelligence?
There are direct and indirect ways to stimulate emotional intelligence. Directly, taking care of emotional health is one way.
You can practice mindfulness and meditation, combined with therapy with a psychologist.
Thinking about a more focused focus on the world of work, many people like the coaching methodology. Thus, there are several trained professionals who offer mentoring for those seeking greater control over their professional lives.
Furthermore, indirect stimuli are everywhere. Whether in books or films, many fictional characters can serve as inspiration for us to learn how to deal with adverse situations.
Emotional intelligence test
Emotional intelligence tests allow people to analyze their existing skills and those to be developed. You can manage your emotions better and read other people's feelings more easily.
You may have already taken an IQ test, one might imagine. The EQ test can provide some important answers.
Finally, find an emotional intelligence test online and try to find out more about yourself.
We recommend two online emotional intelligence tests:
